Monday, February 2, 2009

I Need Help!

Okay, if you have never commented before on my blog, please speak up now! I don't know what to do with a picky eater. Mr. Picky is also known as Mamush. He now refuses most foods which he didn't do when we first brought him home. The only things he will eat are oatmeal, Cream of Wheat, and cottage cheese. Period! He will go without if I don't feed him one of those things, so what do I do? Do I not give him one of those foods? He is iron and protein deficient. He gets a daily vitamin plus his iron supplementation. If he was malnourished, he has been well-fed for the last year. I did witness him doing the same thing at the transitional home, but I don't know how they handled it. I don't have a problem with him just eating 3 foods. It makes it easy for me, but what is best for his health? He is a stubborn little boy. I'm so torn.

I almost forgot to mention that Maritu has no problems eating what Mamush won't. We have yet to see her turn down any food at any time! In fact, she starts screaming when she sees that she is half-way done. It's just like clock work. Maybe that's because she was grossly malnourished when she was taken into custody? Does that stay in a baby's mind for over a year? Or does she just like to eat? I do! ...especially chocolate!

10 comments:

  1. Holly, I can only speak from experience with my bio daughter, who obviously never spent time in a third world country or institution, so I don't know if it makes a difference, but here goes: he will be okay. Give him the three or four foods he likes, the nutritional supplements, and keep offering other foods. My daughter was the world's pickiest eater from birth. She even had a preferred breast for nursing... not so nice for mom when one side dried up and the other was going full-steam ahead! At toddler age, I am not exaggerating when I say she ate about five different foods. By elementary school, she was up to maybe 20. I just quit worrying about it and gave her whatever she would actually eat. I think right now, if you just give Mamush the things he will eat and continue to offer other foods, eventually (and it might be REALLY eventual) he will start to eat other things. Since you are giving him supplements, I'm sure he will be fine. In this country, we have a lot of issues about food. Anna's picky eating still drives my husband nuts. You have lots of other things to worry about, so don't let food be one of them! Hugs.

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  2. My second son always had major food issues. He still prefers oatmeal and cereals and cream of wheat. Have you tried applesauce, cream soups, cous cous, rice based casseroles, bologna, tofu? All of those are my son's preferred foods, I think it has to do with texture. He has a lot of sensory issues.

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  3. I have a picky eater too! So no help there...
    I'm glad to see you home and all doing fairly well!

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  4. I have two 20-month-olds and sometimes encounter this same thing. As hard as it for me to not give in, I do offer only what we are having for the meal. There is always something that they will eat, even if the rest goes untouched, but it's never enough to make an entire meal out of their favorite part. I never make it an issue. If they ask to be excused (signing "all done") and only took a couple of bites, we let them down and leave their plates on the table while we finish our meal. They will often come back for little bites here and there. Last night, one little one was throwing a spectacular tantrum because she wanted more orange and didn't want anything else. I held firm and kept saying "no more orange; you're welcome to eat the rest of your dinner or you can wait until breakfast". Twenty minutes later, she had cleaned her entire plate. Children will NOT starve themselves unless they know that it's a ploy that will work! There are some days that our two will eat hardly a bite for breakfast or lunch, but will then wolf down all of their dinner. Or dinner doesn't go over big, but then they have a great breakfast. It is hard to wait out the stubborn one, but I do believe it's important that we all eat healthfully. I also refuse to be a short-order cook! They don't have to eat what's offered, but that's all that there will be until the next meal (or snack). You may want to just try offering a little bit of the foods he will eat, alongside other offerings. Then, when he finishes what he will eat, excuse him if he doesn't want anything else and explain that that will be all until the next meal or snack. I do not make it a power struggle at all; I just keep repeating "you don't have to eat it, but that's all there is". Our two were also extremely malnourished, both weighing fewer than 4 lbs. at 2 months of age (they are also Ethiopian), but, for the most part, they are excellent eaters and I really want to keep them that way!

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  5. Holly,
    See this link: http://ethiopianadoptiontravelogue.wordpress.com/
    titled "Fake Abesha Cooking". It has some quick fixes of food that might be more familiar to him. Hope that helps; the kids are gorgeous!
    Jenny

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  6. Wish I had advive. Maybe ask his pediatrician? You could also supplement with something like pediasure? Good luck!

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  7. Food issues are so hard and exhausting! Adding his personal health history is difficult. Could you maybe "push" the food issue on at least one meal a day. Offering a little of what he likes along with other stuff that you know he liked from before. Then the other two meals stick to what he likes?

    Beza is a tough one too but we are pushing it gradually and she is starting to cave on some of the foods once we tell her. This is all that is for dinner.

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  8. My 3 yr old is a super picky eater. And contrary to what most people say, I definitely think he WOULD starve. The problem with him is that he loves fruits and veggies, but we have a hard time getting him to eat anything else. I'd say feed Mamush what he likes, but offer new foods on a regular basis. We are still doing this, and honestly, it's not that big of a deal to me. It takes me no time at all to make something I know he'll like (such as PB&J or a cheese quesadilla - nothing complex!) and I figure that eating something is better for him nutritionally than eating nothing (he also takes vitamins daily).

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  9. You can sneak some extra nutrition in the food by adding things like chicken broth or cream. They told me at my sons' orphanage that they were eating vegetable and chicken soup and injera amongst other things. I thought soup was odd for a 8 and 18 month old, but when I got back pictures from a disposable camera I had sent, I saw them soaking the injera and breads in the soup and then feeding it to them with their hands. My son will eat almost anything we feed him with our hands, but will often leave that same food just sitting on his tray or refused it from a spoon because he wasn't used to that. So try feeding with your hands and cooking food (rice, oatmeal,etc) with broth or cream for the added nutrients/fat. I would try to buy some injera and try breaking off pieces and trying new foods in that or soaking bread in some foods.

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  10. Thank you all for the words of wisdom!

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